McFadden Releases Long Form Grocery List

For years, my detractors have been spreading the scurrilous rumor that I subsist solely on coffee, beer, and burritos. I didn’t want to dignify that absurd lie with a response, but my hand has been forced.

I hope this settles the debate so I can move on to the serious business of drawing a fart cloud that has testicles for some reason.

Super-Mega-Hyperlocal News

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Sorry for the late update. A cold knocked me on my ass this week. I’ll try to whip together a make-up Quickie over the weekend.

If the term’s unfamiliar to you, hyperlocal news is the internet’s attempt to fill the void left by disappearing local newspapers. But the internet pays shit, so it’s mostly one person with a Google Alert for a town or neighborhood and aggregating whatever pops up.

Next Week: Non-Profitables

Weapons in the War for Drugs

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These are desperate times, and despite my disdain for stoner culture, I made this cartoon to coincide with the week of April 20 in a pandering grab for pageviews. Sure, not all stoner entertainment is bad. I enjoy Half Baked and Pineapple Express, and everything Doug Benson does, but they’re the exceptions to the rule. Weed would already be legal if it weren’t for its most vocal advocates. I love beer too, but I don’t prance around brewpubs and Octoberfests in bare feet while twirling devil sticks.

I’m not going to waste your time talking about why marijuana should be legalized. That position has an even wider acceptance than gay marriage, and once the Boomers shit the bed, they’ll both be non-issues.

This is the second comic in a row where ordering a pizza was involved in a panel. I’m sorry. I really like pizza, and I’ve watched this sketch about a million times:

Next Week: Super-Mega-Hyperlocal News

Candidate Mitt

I’m not a big fan of 2012 election commentary this early, but Mitt Romney’s a tool. The guy will say and do anything to grub for votes, somehow unaware that there’s tons of video of him saying fairly reasonable things to get elected by the sane residents of Massachusetts (ie: Not Scott Brown’s or Stephen Lynch’s base.).

And since most of New Hampshire’s population lives right on the Massachusetts border, I’m going to be bombarded with ads for this shithead until the primary. I’d rather watch Bob’s Discount Furniture ads on a constant loop.

Reality Show Pitches

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I don’t watch as much garbage TV as I used to, but I watch enough of The Soup to know what’s going on in Garbageland. If you’re a fan of the recapping reality shows genre, check out David Rees, Paul F. Tompkins, and Tom Scharpling‘s stuff over at NYMag.

Remember when I did a cartoon about baseball last week and hoped the Red Sox were as good as everyone was predicting? Haha. I’m a fuckin’ dummy.

Next Week: Weapons for the War on Drugs